I just had a thought. I was cleaning up, while dancing and/or maybe twerking to Beyonce (Im not ashamed). But I just had a thought.....ready?
So ever since I began speech therapy, I have been working on the importance of feeling shame and recovering. As a stutterer I can say that I feel shame often. Its less now than it has ever been, but there are moments of shame that come, specially is high anxiety situations. In the past I would dwell on speech situations that went horribly (in my mind) for sometimes days after the event occurred. Now, I force myself to not dwell on these events, but make an assessment and continue with my day. Getting to this point even has taken a lot of time....this is where the big Oprah AHAH moment comes.
We as stutterers have the opportunity to practice recovering from shame (for myself) multiple times a day. That makes us so resilient. Such fighters. We can choose to go through this life, picking ourselves back up over and over, thus making us stronger and stronger. . We just have to make the choice to make the shame make us stronger. (can you say that 4x's fast)
The average person doesn't have this.^^
The average person, and when I say average I mean someone who does not have an ailment or disability that is apparent and not hidden. The average person can more easily decide to hide their shame until moments in life bring it out to the forefront.
I urge you and myself, to see this challenge to build yourself stronger than you ever thought possible. Shame and fear is there for us to learn from not hide from. Getting to the other side only makes us stronger, better, more compassionate, and much more interesting.
Let's Do It!
Encouraging stuff. Especially the part about "the average person". Glad to know you're fully pursuing your passion unhibited.
ReplyDelete*uninhibited
ReplyDeleteThank you so very much, it took a lot of time, to even get to that level. Change takes time.
ReplyDeleteI'm not sure about the benefit of this "practice of recovering from shame". As for myself, I don't feel like I'm recovering, I feel that I'm sweeping those emotions of shame under a carpet and am afraid that they are piling up somewhere inside. And that they will one day result in a physical disease. I would like to believe that YOU are right, though :)
ReplyDeleteWHy do you feel this way? I never wipe my shame under a mat, I acknowledge that it is there, allow myself to feel, then think about what good happened during the speaking situation. No experience can be only negative, there has to be some type of positivity included with it. It may take time to find it, but the more you practice this, the easier they are to find.
Deleteas a non stutterer i loved this. the message is universal. As anyone trying to accomplish un-normal goals the disappointments are rapidly random, and hard to pick yourself up from. What a blessed gift it is that you, everyday, conquer the fears of facing your shame. It is often shame that prohibits me from continuing, not the act of failing. Thanks you for reminding me that the shameless are survivors. Embracing my failures makes me a success. Love you Jack!
ReplyDeleteXOXOXOXOX!!!!!!!!
ReplyDelete