Today was really a beautiful day. For the past week, specially after the obonxious encounter I had with the Trader Joes customer who mocked my stutter, Id been going to work dreading talking to people, my thoughts were turning all people into horrible,uncaring assholes. As difficult as it was to begin i started using voluntary stuttering again at the cash register. I had stopped and began practicing my easy onsets and prolongations, but whenever I use those for too long, I notice that I fall back in the habit of trying to hide my stutter with them...which is so dangerous for me.
So i voluntary stuttered. A lot, like so much so that Im sure people were like "really?" But i don't care, I need the extreme desensitization after that week, to prove to myself again that all people aren't shitty, and that I can overcome that set back.
It went well. It really did, I got wonderful eye contact from a lot of people, and patience...It felt good. BTW I also introduced myself to a new crew member that I hadn't met before, he had great eye contact and held my hand for over 30 seconds until i got my name out. It was refreshing.
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